Goodbye, Productivity Guilt: A Guide to Emotional Freedom
It seems difficult to argue with the belief that the more you do, the more “successful” you become.
Yet.. is that really true? Does productivity really = success? According to…who, exactly?
Have you considered that you’ll probably never be productive enough to feel 100%, irreversibly and undeniably successful?
According to this logic, there will always be more to conquer and accomplish. Which means you’ll never be done.
There is some sense in the fact that productivity demonstrates your abilities and skills for all to see. Yet this philosophy of living and working has a dark side, too.
When your personal productivity becomes a condition of self- and social- acceptance, overshadowing your other priorities, the only resolution is total burnout.
In one way or another, everyone has felt some form of productivity guilt. You fill every second of your day with tasks, projects, and meetings. Getting as much work done as possible has become the primary, yet unspoken goal of almost everything we do. Yet when the day is over, you feel like you didn't do enough. As a result, you make a new, longer to-do list and promise yourself you’ll be more productive tomorrow. But the guilt comes back the next day, and the cycle repeats itself.
Isn’t it just completely exhausting? Why do you feel productivity guilt, and how can you fix it?
Read all about the surprising answers to these questions in this article.
What Is Productivity Guilt?
As the name suggests, productivity guilt can be defined as guilt produced by feeling that you haven’t accomplished as much as you think, feel or believe that you should in a given time (or all the time). Productivity guilt is the result of wanting to be beyond productive.
While thriving for reasonable productivity is good, striving for absolute excellence can negatively impact your health and wellbeing. It’s a good idea to know the basics of how to stop feeling guilty for a primer on tackling this difficult emotion, because productivity guilt is often rooted in the same focus on external approval. But because getting things done is generally seen as a positive thing, this particular form of guilt can be pretty difficult to address.
If you feel guilty about having free time or resting, or if you never feel that what you’ve done in a day is enough, consider stopping for a moment to see whether you're not caught up in the productivity loop.
As mental health experts explain, this feeling is generated when you link your behavior, performance, and productivity with self-worth. With this belief system, being less less productive becomes equivalent to a personal failure or flaw. This dynamic pushes you to go above and beyond what you need to do to feel good about yourself. Since being productive defines your value, feeling good requires being highly productive.
Like anxiety-driven perfectionism, productivity guilt drives us to be the best in everything we do in life. When perfectionists have everything under control, they feel satisfied, even if the effort has been excessive or come at a high cost. That feeling of accomplishment is addictive; it hooks you. And this is not a coincidence.
Whenever we complete a task on our to-do list, for instance, the dopamine reward system in our brain releases a substance that results in a feeling of satisfaction.
But be careful!
This can easily lead to dissatisfaction with everything because nothing is ever enough, and we can fall into a spiral of striving to achieve increasingly complex objectives, generating anxiety when we inevitably fall short of expectations.
In turn, productivity guilt spills over into other spheres of your life, producing feelings of anxiety, impostor syndrome, and, in some cases, different types of burnout. Over time, productivity guilt affects your health since it wears out your brain by wanting to do too many things a day without real rest time apart from sleeping hours. Moreover, it erodes your self-esteem and spirit by making you believe that your worth as a person is determined by what you do.
Why Do We Feel Guilty for Doing Nothing?
Productivity guilt is associated with feeling bad about not completing tasks, accomplishing goals, or working hard. Several factors can make you feel like you’re underperforming when it comes to productivity, but let's look at the most common reasons:
You set unrealistic goals. Predicting how long each task will take before starting it can be difficult. And tasks you’ve never done before usually take a lot longer than you expect! Even the most organized people often underestimate their abilities and fail to complete their tasks. The frustration of not being able to complete all of the tasks you set out for that day (even if they were impossible) can even outweigh the accomplishments you made.
You measure your self-esteem with achievements. The satisfaction of crossing off a large number of tasks on our list makes us feel productive. However, distractions and interruptions will always affect the amount of work we accomplish. Inevitably, there will always be more tasks than we can achieve during the day. This is why measuring self-esteem by this metric can be dangerous.
You believe that others are more productive than you are. You may feel disappointed when you look at others' progress and achievements. Other people always seem to have more time or are more productive during their work hours than we are. In reality, the feeling is mutual, and adopting a competitive culture in these terms can be harmful.
You are held back by limiting beliefs. Society has shaped your beliefs based on cultural values that may not necessarily be true or helpful, but govern you all the same. You live your life according to these beliefs, which prioritize the importance of what you produce, consume, and generate. Here are some examples:
I have to have money to feel calm and safe.
The more successful I am, the more I am worth as a person.
Being busy shows that I am an important person.
If I leave work late, I show that I have a high commitment.
I can only allow myself to rest on vacation.
Life consists of working and striving to have what is necessary to live.
How to Overcome Hustle-Guilt (and Just Relax)
You may know that chasing productivity is not healthy, but still feel powerless to overcome hustle culture and just chill.
Take it from a psychologist (me): Your body and your mind need a break.
Everyone knows the feeling of burnout when working too hard and too long without resting. However, it's easy to lose track of your own mental health when you're trying to achieve something big. True change requires that you tame your restlessness, mind, anxiety, and anguish whenever you don't feel productive. You can find peace in your everyday life by following these strategies.
1. Re-define what productivity means to you.
Realize that not only what generates money or is measurable in numbers is productive. Even something as simple as watching the sunset is productive because it generates feelings of joy that will give you the energy to do what you want later. Whatever you do, as long as it is inspired by your values and who you want to be, is productive.
2. Set realistic goals for yourself.
Your to-do-list of the day probably looks easy on paper, but the reality quickly reveals itself to be much more challenging. In most cases, we set ourselves really high goals that lead to frustration and guilt. Having pending tasks at the end of the day (even if you've done your best to finish them) can be very exhausting.
Avoid this problem by identifying the two or three most important tasks of your day and moving the rest to a 'pending’ list. This process will force you to evaluate why the task is important, which will give you peace of mind at the end of the day that you’re making progress on vital priorities - even if you haven't completed all of the tasks you had planned.
If you are struggling to motivate yourself and get organized, try the 100-day productivity challenge to start living a balanced, productive life.
3. Recognize your limitations.
Despite what you may think in desperate moment, you you can't do everything - and that's okay! Try to remember this when you feel overwhelmed with guilt and anxiety and feel you should be doing more.
Maybe you can sit down with a piece of paper and list the things that make it difficult for you to "be perfect". Please do not take this as an excuse list, nor is it something that you should blame yourself for. It's just a realistic view of your situation. It's possible that you have children waiting at home, so you can't work after 5 pm. Maybe you've been studying since the morning, so you're too tired to begin a new topic at 7 pm.
Things like those are not excuses nor are they things you should blame on yourself. Feeling guilty over things you can't change will only increase your anxiety and frustration. In the end, you will be able to set more realistic goals if you accept them and don't put too much pressure on yourself because they are simply the way things are.
4. Look for progress; not achievements.
In one day, completing a big project, report, presentation, or other activity can be difficult or even impossible. Breaking down those big tasks into "sub-tasks" that you can assign for each day is easier and more satisfying. This way, completing each "sub-task" will give you a feeling of progress, without having to finish the whole thing.
5. Practice self-empathy.
It's common for us to be harder on ourselves than we would be on our friends. Let's say one of your friends came to you and said,
"I've been working since 6 am nonstop. I didn't even stop for lunch, but I still haven’t managed to finish everything I've promised today."
Would you tell your friend,
"Get your act together and keep working! It won’t get done on its own. You should be less lazy and stop complaining!”
…?
No, probably not! Maybe you'd get a friend in the same situation a tasty slice of something chocolate to break up the monotony.
The curious thing is that most of the time, that's how we talk to ourselves.
Being your own friend is a great way to break free from productivity guilt. Give yourself a break if you're tired. If you need motivation, treat yourself!
The Productivity Trap: Make Peace with How You Spend Your Time
There will always be more things to do in the day.
For this reason, many times the solution is not looking for more productivity techniques, but rather finding purpose in the tasks you are already working on. If your day involves responding to an inbox full of urgent, un-answered emails, then learn how to stay mindful while using the most addictive apps instead of squeezing a meditation session into your day.
When you find prupose in what you’re doing, you’ll feel fulfilled not because you did a hundred things, but because the ones you did were important.
You create your life with every action you take, no matter how small. So don’t lose yourself in the process. Remember that the best thing you can do is be yourself every step of the way.
We invite you to feel calm for the simple fact of being yourself, and forget to put conditions on that tranquility. Remember that what you do is a reflection of your essence and your creativity - not an obligation to exist.
Yes, you can manage your time better and set better expectations - but in the end, you have to take care of yourself. You need to stop obsessing about your to-do list and preserve your mental health. You can only do one thing at a time, and that’s never going to change. Take pride in the things you did rather than blaming yourself for the things you didn't accomplish.
And remember to be kind to yourself.
Take time to remind yourself:
"I worked hard today; I gave it my best shot; I did a good job."