5 Simple Steps to Discover Clarity with Self-Reflection
Know thyself…
It’s not clear who wrote it but what is clear is that self-reflection has been a tool for human happiness for thousands of years.
Why?
It can call into question many aspects of our lives that might otherwise go unnoticed, unchecked for basically all of our existence. Our moral standings, our career choices, our relationship preferences, our self rhetorics, and, perhaps most challengingly, our egos are all fundamental aspects to who we are, yet very few of us take the time to reflect on these things.
So, why should you challenge yourself like this through self-reflection?
Read on to find out.
Self-Reflection And The Ego
Our ego can be a very cunning sidekick, filled with stories we tell ourselves about our Self (with a capital S). The Self is the person we identify with, the person we think we are and who we introduce ourselves as at parties.
But when we think about our Self, we are usually thinking of our ego, or the person we tell ourselves we are.
The ego is made up of the many experiences, beliefs, prejudices, and judgments placed upon us by others and ourselves since we were children.
How?
We compile the judgments of our parents, our friends, our local community, and broader society, in general, to come up with a self-story that we identify as “me”.
It’s how we know who we are and which groups we belong to. From an evolutionary perspective, it’s an essential part of survival.
The problem?
This compilation of judgments can lead us away from our inner goodness and the very essence that makes us unique in the world.
This is where self-reflection can really help.
It can expose our ego, calling out what is true and untrue (rather than getting caught up in the drama we create in our heads). This can allow us to ignore the judgments that are thrown our way and help find and cement who we truly are.
So how do we do it? By slowing down and, well, reflecting.
How to Engage in Meaningful Self-Reflection
Many philosophers, from Aristotle to Socrates, praised the many benefits of “knowing thyself”. So, how do we actually practice self-reflection? Here are a few simple tips that will help:
Stop what you’re currently doing.
Take a moment, pull yourself out of the situation or circumstance you find yourself in, no matter how painful or uncomfortable it may be, and take a step back. If it helps, go to a quiet area by yourself and take a few deep breaths.
Notice what’s going on around you.
Once you’ve taken this step, act as the observer. Sit back, observe, and take a look at what is unfolding before you. Don’t try to explain it or understand it. Just look at the situation and identify all of its parts.
Listen closely to your inner self.
Listen to your inner guide, what is it telling you? Who would you like to be in this moment? How would you like to act? How would you like to conduct yourself? This is a great opportunity to cultivate the kind of person you want to be.
Act intentionally.
Don’t be reactionary. Think and give yourself time to react as you would like to, not as your ego demands you should.
Reflect on your responses and how (or if) you would like to change.
Take time to reflect on how everything played out and identify any aspects that you can change, adjust, or improve.
Questions to Support the Process of Self-Reflection
Self-reflection isn’t about finding answers - it’s about asking the right questions to promote personal growth. Here are a few thought-provoking questions to ponder that will support your self-reflection.
What are my core values? My core beliefs? My priorities? What guides my principle and ideas that are most deeply important to me?
What are my strongest gifts, talents, skills, or strengths that are unique to me?
And what are some of my weaknesses and shortcomings that I should be aware of?
Who would I like to be? And how can I be a better person?
How do I get there? What sort of energy would I like to bring into my life and the life of others?
What is the difference I would like to make in the world? How could I contribute, serve, or add value?
What inspires me? What am I most passionate about? What do I love? And what drives me, engages me, motivates me, and excites me?
Are any of my beliefs or core values damaging or limiting to me or others?
What do I want from life?
When am I at my best? When is it the easiest to be me?
All big questions, no doubt! Although, this is what self-reflection is all about. Asking yourself the tough questions, confronting your ego, and setting your prejudices, bias, and partialities aside while making yourself aware of not only your shortcomings but also your strengths.
Final Thoughts
It’s time for you to take a step back, breathe a big deep breath, jump off the fast-paced and ceaseless treadmill life, and take some time for you to reflect.
Make self-reflection as much as a part of your life as you possibly can, this is the only way to know thyself and reach an inner balance.
Don’t shy away from the tough and difficult questions, this is the only way to align yourself with who you really are.
So, what next big question are you going to ask yourself?